Category: Ranting

Ranting

Thinking past the first step?

During one of my walks over the weekend, passing through Dupont Circle I stumbled across a sleeply 3rd year anniversary protest of the War in Iraq. It had all the common characteristics of such protests: bad poetry slams by wanna-be Jello Biafras, lots of people in need of a bath, a heaping helping of ill-conceived self-righteousness, Lyndon Larouche zombies, and more stupid signs than I could count.

I didn’t have my camera with me, so I had to search the web for something similar, and I think this does the trick, well illustrating one of the most foolish signs I saw that afternoon:

I wonder if these people are actually thinking about what they’re asking for. I say America sould give them their wish. Impeach Bush; bring on President Cheney!

Even the departing editor of the Economist isn’t above chopstick praise

The Financial Times’ Emiko Terazono recently interviewed Bill Emmott, the soon-to-be-departing editor of The Economist (OOPS! The FT took it down but you can still read the interview here). The interview was conducted at a Japanese restaurant in London over lunch (scroll down to the bottom to see what they ate and how much it cost). In the article, Terazono describes Emmott‘s truly enviable career as a journalist and noted Japan expert, and toward the end makes the following observation:

He holds his chopsticks perfectly, and lifts his rice bowl when eating from it – as the Japanese do. He also does not make the common gaijin faux pas of pouring soy sauce on his rice.

I did a little (very little) digging to make sure Terazono is not simply an adopted Briton who kept her Japanese name (a la Kazuo Ishiguro, the author of The Remains of the Day). Turns out, according to this interview, Ms. Terazono was born in Japan 40 years ago, spent her junior high and high school years in Canada, went to a Japanese college, worked at a bank, hated it, and then got work at the FT Tokyo Bureau, where she fought hard for six years to get out before getting assigned to the London headquarters. So that confirms that she is writing from the perspective of a member of Japanese society, not that of a gaijin herself.

IMO, the observation works well to drive home the point that not only is Mr. Emmott a well-received author on Japan (whom I have not read, unfortunately), he actually took the time to get the little things “right” about Japanese culture and thereby truly understands it. Don’t you get that impression?

But wait a minute – do his table manners really matter? I mean, would a journalist in India, for example, earn the respect of the locals by eating with his/her fingers and refusing to carry around toilet paper? Would his analysis ring untrue if he didn’t?
Continue reading Even the departing editor of the Economist isn’t above chopstick praise

Avoiding lameness in Narita ground transportation: a primer

I leave in a few hours to spend my spring break in Florida—actually one of the last places I expected to spend spring break, but Ms. Joe has a new, difficult job and needs someone to give her backrubs at night.

Anyway, Narita is a really inconvenient airport. No matter how you do it, it takes at least an hour to get there from the city. Then there’s the time you have to spend getting to wherever you’re boarding your transportation, and the time you have to spend wandering around the terminal to get where you need to be. If you’re like me, you also have to factor in the time you spend being held for questioning.

It used to be worse, actually. Back in the day, the trains to Narita didn’t even stop at the terminal. You had to get off on the edge of the airport property and then take a bus. Fortunately, the Transport Minister figured this was daft, and he opened up some underground platforms that were originally intended for a Shinkansen line. (He’s a great guy—his name is Ishihara.) So today, the trains drop you off inside the terminals… but you still have to go up four stories to get to check-in. Hmpfh.

So what’s the best way to get to and from the airport? Continue reading Avoiding lameness in Narita ground transportation: a primer

OMG, more kabuki!

When I saw the editorial titled Kabuki Congress, I knew what the next blog post would be.

The question is whether the Bush administration broke the law by allowing the National Security Agency to spy on Americans and others in the United States without obtaining the required warrant. The White House wants Americans to believe that the spying is restricted only to conversations between agents of Al Qaeda and people in the United States. But even if that were true, which it evidently is not, the administration has not offered the slightest evidence that it could not have efficiently monitored those Qaeda-related phone calls and e-mail messages while following the existing rules.

In other words, there is not a shred of proof that the illegal program produced information that could not have been obtained legally, had the administration wanted to bother to stay within the law.

…Putting on face paint and pretending that illusion is reality is fine for Kabuki theater. Congress should have higher standards.

I mean, it’s the usual NYT line, but you gotta love the kabuki.

Now You Can Listen to anti-Japanese Rap Song “Fuck Zapan” Courtesy Mutant Frog Travelogue

DJ Doc
One of my first posts for Mutant Frog Travelogue concerned the strange case of an anti-Japanese rap song from Korean rap group DJ Doc (pictured above). In my infinite magnanimity, I translated the unintentionally hilarious lyrics:

Are you going to lie about your own history?! (Hai!) Go ahead and lie, you deceitful pigfeet!
Pussies! How much will you lie, pigfeet?! Keep on lying, Japs!
Lie to your mom and dad! Lie to your mom and dad!
Will you eat your mom? (Hai!) Is that OK? Yeah, that’s fine! That’s just fine!
Retard bitches! Go and have a seizure!
You barbarian, epileptic Japanese!
Mouse-dicked Jeps “Japan is our toilet!”… FUCK!
Pucking nation.. Chapan is a Pucking nation*4 (repeat 2x)

The post proved to be one of our most popular and generated comments that ranged from the merely curious (“Can’t we ALL just get ALONG?!”) to the downright deranged (“You’ll never look as good as the white man. so go eat some kemchi or sushi or shrimp fried rice you slit/slant eyed freaks.”).

Unfortunately, the site I originally linked to took down the audio clip, and I accidentally deleted the MP3 I had. But now I’m feeling generous again, so here it is again in all its amateurish glory! I’ve saved the file here, so this song will never again be lost to history. Try singing along using my English version of the lyrics!

(Thanks to ZMPK for making the song available again and Saru for taking the time to search for it)

Energy Crisis SOLVED

Check this out!

Friday, March 3, 2006

Japanese Scientists Extract Gasoline From Cow Waste

TOKYO (Nikkei)–Once considered useful only for fertilizer, scientists are finding new uses for cow excrement as a result of technological developments.

Researchers at the Tokyo University of Agriculture and Technology have found a way to produce gasoline out of cow waste in a tie-up with the National Institute of Advanced Industrial Science and Technology.

Using metal catalysts, the partners have successfully produced 1.4 milliliters of gasoline out of 100 grams of such waste after applying 30 atmospheres of pressure on it and heating it to 300 C.

The research partners believe a large facility capable of converting cow excrement into a significant volume of gasoline will be in demand from livestock farmers, who have a hard time disposing of the waste. They hope to commercialize such a facility within five years.
Continue reading Energy Crisis SOLVED

Asahi Irresponsible on Iran? Not really.

Commenter Jim Moore of the blog “Moore Than This” suggested that Japan is taking an extremely irresponsible stance on Iran’s nuclear ambitions based on an editorial he picked up from the Asahi Shimbun’s English edition:

Iran’s publicly stated intention to advance its nuclear technology threatens a key element of Japan’s energy strategy–development of the Azadegan oil field … If Tehran does not alter its position, Japan could lose its rights to the field.

The article is indeed impactful, but the Asahi English edition seems to have taken it out of context a bit. The original Japanese piece was a part of the regular column “Reading the Economy” which focuses on economic aspects of current events.　It runs in the back pages and is not intended to serve as the crux of the newspaper’s editorial position.

One advantage that newspapers have over online news sources is their effective allocation of space to individual news stories/editorials. For people like me who only have occasionaly access to Japanese newspaper, this can be a problem. Asahi’s English site, for example, gives the paper’s editorials equal space next to background pieces like the one described. The Japanese site separates the op-ed section by column. Note to Asahi: PLEASE edit your English Op-ed section to make it less confusing!

For a better idea of what the Asahi really thinks of the Iran crisis, check this Asahi editorial, which puts them much closer to mainstream opinion:

That means Tehran should stop enriching uranium on its soil. It should allow the process to be done in Russia. That will provide the much-needed proof that it does indeed seek to build nuclear power plants as it claims. Once it becomes clear that Iran has no intention of developing nuclear weapons, Tehran will receive international support for its nuclear program.

While denouncing the IAEA resolution, Iran has shown a willingness to accept routine inspections by the IAEA. That seems to be a ploy to shake international unity on the issue through a combination of hard-line and soft-line tactics. It may also be aimed at prodding China and Russia, which have taken a more conciliatory stance toward Iran, into avoiding any sanctions against Iran. For that, the roles of China and Russia in persuading Iran to abandon its nuclear ambitions are very important. Time is limited. The international community should work out a formula to ensure a diplomatic solution to the crisis before resorting to forceful means, such as sanctions.

And indeed, MOFA’s official position on the issue is even clearer:
Continue reading Asahi Irresponsible on Iran? Not really.

OK, so I had a dream with this insane concept for a movie

I have lunch with Roland Soong and his Chinese girlfriend (petite, bubbly voice, intelligent) at a Chinese restaurant in a Japanese city (Osaka?). We discuss poverty in Japan and China and I mention something about a black underclass in Japan. We discuss other really intelligent things and then go and take some kind of weird water ride that’s kind of like underwater paddleboats. The end of the ride deposits us in a huge pond where this funny white guy is splashing everyone.

Then we walk outside the building, which was white with this glass exterior. I have a thought that I really like it when people have toothy grins and the reason I don’t like people sometimes is just because their smiles are a little off, or really just not toothy enough.
Continue reading OK, so I had a dream with this insane concept for a movie

Akebono to Diet? – it’s not what you think

Atsushi Onita, ex-wrestler and member of Japan’s Upper House of parliament (Liberal Democratic Party, Proportional Representation) has publicly encouraged Taro Akebono, Sumo wrestling’s first non-Japanese Yokozuna, to make a run for a seat in next year’s Upper House election. Since retiring from Sumo entirely in 2003 to take up a career as a professional wrestler/kickboxer, Akebono (born Chad Rowan and raised in Hawaii) has seen his respectability drop quite a bit, not least because he keeps losing his big matches. However, it’s certainly possible that enough people will vote LDP to make him the first American Diet member. Daily Sports reports:

Akebono: Run in the Election!
Onita Calls on Akebono to Run in Next Year’s Upper House Election at LDP Headquarters in Nagata-cho

“Let’s light a fire under Nagata-cho!” (NOTE: Nagata-cho = Japan’s version of Capitol Hill) — Atsushi Onita (48), LDP Upper House member and self-described professional wrestling/fighting sport analyst, held an emergency press conference in Tokyo on Feb. 14 at the LDP Headquarters in Tokyo to make a “love call” for Akebono (36), the former Sumo Yokozuna and [naturalized] Japanese citizen, to run in the Upper House election next July. Onita elevated Akebono to the level of “the savior of professional wrestling” and even unilaterally offered to initiate him with a no-rope barbed-wire electric-explosive death match (Onita’s trademark). A national crisis may arise if a grand battle unfolds in a Diet-floor-turned-wrestling ring.

Onita, at a press conference the same day announcing the release of his new single, “FIRE!!” (released Feb. 15), started off, “The savior of professional wrestling is Akebono. I would like to hand over the catch phrase ‘FIRE’ that the pro wrestling world gave birth to and have him become the momentum for wrestling’s development and revival.” (NOTE: Listen to Onita’s band here by clicking the music note. “FIRE!!” does not seem to be up on the site yet. His music is surprisingly mellow for a guy who made a living throwing people into exploding barbwire!)

Certainly expectations are high for Akebono, who is taking the major wrestling groups All-Japan Pro Wrestling, NOAH, and New Japan Pro Wrestling by storm, but by “momentum for development and revitalization” Onita is referring to entering politics.

Onita (who is known as “the charisma of tears“) explained, “While enlisting the aid of politics, I would like him to carry out ambitious reform of professional wrestling. If Onita, Hiroshi Hase (Lower House, Ishikawa 1st District, another wrestler-cum-LDP Dietman), and Akebono come together then [we could put our heads together]” He then bluntly stated, “I want him to run in next year’s Upper House election. Only through overcoming that battle can he become the savior.”

The retired wrestler had scathing remarks for Akebono’s wrestling partner, Riki Choshu, “He’s training him normally, but normal just isn’t good enough. I want to initiate him with an Onita-Akebono no-rope barbed-wire electric-explosive death match,” proposing a subversive method of training.

Onita expressed full confidence in the recommendation, saying, “It’s OK, I don’t select people the way Takebe does,” referring to the controversy over LDP Secretary General Tsutomu Takebe’s strong endorsement of (now reviled) Takafumi Horie in the 2005 election. Onita says he wants to take Akebono to the Diet member meeting house to negotiate as early as next week.

Go for it, Akebono! I’ll get Mrs. Adamu to vote LDP if you run. Or better yet, run on a DPJ ticket!

Some background:

Japan has something of a tradition of professional wrestlers, actors, authors, athletes, and so on, in politics. Wrestling legend Antonio Inoki (who once fought Muhammad Ali and got knocked out and hospitalized by Hulk Hogan) formed the Sports & Peace Party in 1989 and became the first wrestler Diet member (PR). Recently, the Great Sasuke (JT, reg. req’d) made international headlines when he ran (and won) a seat in the Iwate prefectural assembly despite refusing to take off his wrestling mask.
Continue reading Akebono to Diet? – it’s not what you think