When rikishi attack

Yesterday, Russian rikishi Roho was easily tossed out of the sumo ring by Chiyotaikai (video). As usual, Roho looked like he was about to rip someone a few new assholes. Unfortunately, he wasn’t messing around this time:

Still heated, Roho smashed a bathroom glass window on his way back to the dressing room and after receiving a reprimand from the JSA judging committee, proceeded to attack the photographers who were trying to take his photo.

“Violence toward field reporters is truly shameful and unforgivable for a sportsman,” the Mainichi Shimbun said in a statement.

Exactly what triggered the exchange is unclear but both Roho and Chiyotaikai received warnings from JSA Chairman Kitanoumi. The Russian wrestler later said that Chiyotaikai made a derogatory comment after the bout that set him off.

Roho will forfeit his bout against ozeki Tochiazuma Sunday and have two rest days.

Let’s see him try to get into an onsen now…

The TV has claimed my life!

Some of you might be wondering where the hell I am most of the time. This conversation is illustrative:

Adamu: sup man
Joe: watching TV
Adamu: cweet
Joe: just saw ryoko hirosue score a penalty kick against a dog
Joe: then watched a guy get punk’d by another guy who dressed up as a panda

Normally, I hate TV, but there’s a lot of awesome stuff I’ve been watching lately:

  • Sumo. Foreign rikishi were such a great move! Now we have guys like Roho, who looks at his opponents with a face that says “Listen, buddy, I eat glass and shit sand.” And good ol’ Asashoryu, who’s fond of guts poses and doesn’t make secret his contempt for kimchi.
  • NHK’s Weeky News for Kids. The zero interest rate policy is so much more fun when you have a freaky cartoon character and a weirdo dressed in plaid trying to explain it.
  • Commercials featuring Japanese-speaking foreigners.
  • It’s damn funny to watch Shido Nakamura lamely explain that he was “only drinking oolong tea.”

Someday I’ll get in on the act with my own show, “Bengoshi no JOE!” Every Thursday night, I’ll decide a case along with my two co-judges, a random comedian/dietperson and a random “talent” with huge breasts.

Mr. Icky Raises Japan’s Interest Rate

no-pan shabu shabu.jpg

BOJ Chief Toshihiko Fukui has raised Japan’s interest rates to 0.25%, ending a nearly 6-year period free or less than free money in Japan.

If you’ve spent any extended time in Japan then you have surely had an encounter with an Oyaji (or “ossan” depending on the circumstances). Chances are he looked something like this. You may have suspected that he at one time or another frequented one of Japan’s legalized prostitution hubs, but unlike Mr. Fukui here you had no proof that he liked his shabu shabu with no underwear. Nonetheless, the bad English, stinky breath, irrational claims of Japanese superiority, and general ickiness no doubt put you off.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you King of Oyaji. Behold, and fear for Japan’s future!

Awwwww, yeah

King Becomes Prime Minister’s Chauffeur

Aqaba, Jordan (AHN) — After King Abdullah of Jordan hosted a dinner in the city of Aqaba Thursday for visiting Japanese Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi, he decided to chauffeur him Koizumi back to his hotel.

Koizumi stated, “I did not think the king himself would take me back to my hotel.”

After the king and prime minister talked for two hours over dinner, the king suddenly suggested that he drive Koizumi to his hotel in a Range Rover.

With the king behind the wheel, they arrived at Koizumi’s hotel in high spirits, joking in the Range Rover until Koizumi got out.

Thanks to fark.com 

Koizumi Continues to Flout His Own Constitution!

Koizumi Yarmulke.jpg
Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi respectfully places his hand on the Wailing Wall, one of Judaism’s most sacred sites, in Jerusalem on Thursday during a trip to the Middle East that takes him to Israel, the Palestinian territory and Jordan. (AP)
(From Nikkei)

Who will stop Koizumi from continuing these perverse, random acts of worship?!

I Pray for an End to Hello Kitty Merchandizing

Seriously, I am just so sick of this crap:
kittify.jpg

Are people still interested to see what else the Sanrio people can put Hello Kitty’s face on who else signs up to beat the dead horse that is licensed Sanrio merchandise? If so, get over it! Please! A Hello Kitty guitar simply does not deserve to be front page news these days (as of now it’s the top image at MDN). Last I checked, Hello Kitty merchandise was the Snakes on a Plane of 2 years ago. That is, it all of a sudden started appearing everywhere online, only to spark a quick backlash once it became overexposed.

History of Enka Part 1 of 2

“Enka” is a term referring to a particular genre of Japanese music. It is similar in spirit if not in style to US country music – in other words it sings about the traditional downhome values of Japan and beatifies the past to a certain extent. Here‘s an example of it on YouTube “The Red-bean Camelia is the Flower of Love”. Similar music is popular in most of Asia (including Vietnam, China, and North and South Korea).

What many people don’t know, however, is that enka was not always the music of the status quo (from Wikipedia):

History

Enka was originally a product of the Freedom and People’s Rights Movement. The songs were used as a way to put political statements and messages criticizing clan politics into song. In other words, they are songs that satired politics, and the word “enka” (literally “speech song”) is said to have had its roots the late 19th century when public speeches were harshly repressed, causing speeches to be replaced by singing songs. Even prior to that, there were songs that satired politics, but afterward the name “enka” stuck. However, as time passed the meaning of the word evolved and “enka” is no longer used to refer to songs including political content. From the latter part of the Meiji Era, enka singers came to sing socially satirical songs with emotional themes. In the Taisho era, some enka singers began to incorporate elements of Western music. This was the time of Shunyo Tottori‘s debut (listen to a cover/karaoke of Tottori “Caged Bird” here). His “Caged Bird” captivated a generation of Japanese. In the Showa era, foreign record labels opened operations in Japan, and a new era came to Japan in the form of the recording system. At that time Western-style performers came into fashion and enka gave up its top position in pop culture.