Unfit for the Salamander – A lesson in Japanese etymology

Occasionally I run across a word or phrase in Japanese that I recognize only because I know I’ve looked it up at least two or three times (if not more). Yet for some reason the meaning just won’t stick with me. This happened earlier today while reading the Asahi at work. This time I intend to do something about it, as well as provide an interesting language lesson for any of our readers who are slowly killing themselves learning Japanese.

The phrase in question today is particularly irksome because of its idiomatic nature. I know the meaning of the individual words, but haven’t an inkling what the hell the phrase as a whole means. It’s as if someone was conversing with you in English and described a situation as “unfit for the salamander.”

So now that I’ve hopefully gotten everyone’s attention, here’s the sentence with today’s mystery phrase in bold:

森氏は会議後、記者団に「はっきり言って、さじを投げた」と語った。

Literally, it means, “to throw the spoon.” So the entire sentence literally translates as:

After the meeting Mr. Mori told reporters, “Honestly speaking, [I] threw the spoon.”

So what’s it mean? It means to give up on something.

And just how did it come to mean this? Isn’t that obvious? The Japanese eat with chopsticks, don’t they? Just as the occasional foreigner who visits Japan today and manages to master the art of eating with chopsticks will be repeatedly praised by his hosts, at one time it was equally difficult for Japanese to master the art of eating with a spoon. As anyone who’s tried eating with chopsticks knows, sometimes you just want to throw them on the ground, go for a fork and just dig in. Well, apparently Japanese used to feel the same way about spoons and would often throw them down in resignation.

Okay, okay. I just made all that up. And honestly speaking, that story was about as unfit for the salamander* as one can get.

Actually, the real story as best I can tell is this. The meaning derives from a situation where a doctor diagnoses a patient’s recovery to be hopeless. At one time medicine was prepared with a spoon and once it was determined that someone was a goner, there was no further need to continue preparing medicine and the doctor could just “throw in the spoon,” so to speak.

If anyone out there can add any clarity to this little history lesson (and my money says that Roy can), I will be looking forward to any additions in the comments section.

* As of 6:41 pm on August 8, 2005, the phrase “unfit for the salamander” did not show up on a Google search. It may be a safe assumption that I am among the first, if not the first, to actually use this phrase in a sentence.

How far back does your geneology go?

Prolific blogger Joi Ito delves a bit into his family’s ancient history. It’s a bit awe-inspiring for someone who just barely has a vague idea of which Eastern European countries his grandparents moved to Brooklyn from.

After the study group meeting at City Hall, I visited our family grave. I took a look at where my name will at some point be etched as the 19th family head of the Ito family. I took the opportunity to grill my uncle a bit more about the specifics of our history since I’ll be the custodian of this information at some point. I also had him collect up various family history documents. It appears that the first Ito, moved into our current home about 400 years ago and was some kind of union of a 25th descendent of Emperor Kanmu, the 50th Emperor (we’re on #125 now), and Kawatari Fujiwara. I can’t understand the old-fashioned Japanese text to understand the details of the arrangement. I believe Kawatari Fujiwara was from the Fujiwara family that lived in our region until they were defeated around 400 years ago. The only thing left from this period of the Fujiwara estate/castle is a golden pagoda and mummies in Hiraizumi. Anyway, the story I heard from my mother was that after their defeat, the survivors fled and started their own families in the region, and took the character “Fuji” from “Fujiwara” and changed their names to “Saito”, “Goto” and “Ito” which all use “Fuji” character for the “To” part of the names. Anyway, I’m not positive about the details so I better find out more before I have to take over the family and my children start asking me all kinds of questions.

The Gundam lives!

After seeing my post a couple of days on a homemade full size Gundam robot built several years ago, a reader by the name of Taylor sent in some amazing photographs showing that it has actually been made into a permanent outdoor installation!

He says:

I saw it last month when I was still in Okayama, but it is pretty
popular. It’s right next to a major road, so I saw at least ten people
stop and take pictures with it. Most were older salarymen or ojisan.
It was quite amazing seeing it in person, you can see the size
comparison with me, and i”m not that small of a guy!

I was surprised by how popular Gundam still is over here. When I saw
the recent Z Gundam movie, half the crowd was over 50 years old. It’s
amazing how serious the older generation takes the Universal Century
age Gundam show

And of course, what outdoor art installation or sculpture would be complete without an explanatory plaque?

This robot was placed in Kume-cho by Mister Seiichi Nakamoto (born 1964). He drew up the plans and constructed it himself. The skeleton is constructed of steel and the outer shell of fiber reinforced plastic. The legs can be moved through the action of the hyrdaulic cylinders installed within.

An operator riding in the cockpit can control this versatile bipedal walking machine. After seven years of construction, it was completed in December, 1999.

Height 7 meters
Width 3.5 meters
Weight 2 tons
Passengers 1

Banzai! We just screwed Japan!


The postal privatization bills failed. The Lower House has been dissolved, and there will be an election on Sept. 11. The picture is of Diet members cheering “Banzai” for the emperor (?) after their official dissolution.

Mrs. Saru said it best:

I am super disappointed that the bill did not pass. We have a great Foreign Minister right now who is good for Japan and U.S. relations. Great. So much of what is wrong in the Japanese socity and foreign policy is due to narrow-minded politicians and those who vote for them.

Masturbating for 15 Minutes on the Train “Not Public Indecency”?

The masturbation station
ZAKZAK is better than Waiwai:

Masturbating for 15 Minutes on the Train “Not Public Indecency” Says Man Arrested for Said Crime

Nobody likes a woman who thoughtlessly applies makeup on the train, but this case of a man, driven mad with desire for a woman, furiously masturbating for 15 minutes on the train home was a matter for police. This idiotic man, while admitting his unlawful act, claimed he wasn’t bothering anyone — he is said to be giving the absurd excuse that “it’s not public indecency.” He was working for a big company, had a wife, even bought his own condominium… This man, who was fulfilling the Japanese dream, threw it all away in a mere 15 minutes.

“I saw a girl that was my type, so I just went and did it,” said the 31-year-old employee of Dai-Nippon Printing Co. from Sakura District, Saitama City.

According to the investigations of Saitama Prefectural Police, Tokorozawa Precinct, the man got on the Musashi-Urawa Station on the Musashino Line after midnight on August 2 and sat down next to a woman in her 20s, whereupon he exposed himself and began spanking his monkey. He continued to pleasure himself even after he missed his stop at Nishi-Urawa, not stopping until 15 minutes later when he reached the end of the line, Higashi-Tokorozawa.

Since the few people in the train didn’t seem to notice, the housewife who endured this display of perversion finally barked, “What do you think you’re doing?” when her station drew near.

A male corporate worker (33) sitting nearby made himself useful and held the man down, but thankfully, according to the man, “he didn’t ejaculate.” You might think this was the act of a drunken man acting out in the night, but source say he was “totally sober.”

After graduating from a Hokkaido university, the suspect entered the nation’s largest domestic printing company, Dai-Nippon. He married a classmate from college and only recently moved into a condominium he had purchased near the station [ed: Living near the station is a big perk in Japan].

A neighbor living in his building described him as “small and not terribly handsome, but he was a diligent person who would say hello to you in the morning.

“The room he bought cost 20-30 million yen [about $200-300k] and was the biggest 4-bedroom condo in the building.” The neighbor couldn’t hide her surprise over the incident, saying that he thought they planned to have a big family.

Another neighbor spoke to us about the couple’s relationship.

“The wife worked for a charity, so she didn’t pay much attention to fashion, but she is the type of person who normally has a smile on her face. 5 or 6 of her friends from college would often come to visit, and the two of them would often go out together as a couple. I think they got along well.”

“The couple was married in June at a church in Australia, which reminded them of Hokkaido where they met. The pictures of expansive ocean and white beaches were most memorable for me,” says the neighbor.

When we arrived at the man’s home on the night of the 2nd, his wife would only say, “Nothing happened. Leave us alone, please.” I wonder what evil spirit now haunts what was once a life of smooth sailing.

In an unbelievable development, the man at first told investigators with a straight face, “(The masturbation) was just for my own pleasure, so it’s not public indecency.”

This is a man who, instead of just talking to a woman who’s his type, instead decides to sit next to her and jack off for 15 minutes. It was only a matter of time before he was caught with his pants down.

Did North Korea market missiles to Taiwan?

I have here an article from the July 18 Chuunichi Shinbun. For some reason it is no longer avaliable on the website (404 error), but luckily you can still see the original Japanese text in Google cache.

Did North Korea market missiles to Taiwan?

Seoul- Kiyoshi Nakamura.

According to the issue of Korean Magazine ‘Choson Weekly’ which went on sale July 17th, a former representative (72 years old) of North Korea’s People’s Supreme Congress (basically their ‘parliament’) who recently defected to the South said in a statement to South Korea’s National Information Institute that the North “visited Taiwan for the purpose of exporting North Korean made missiles.”

When asked about the nuclear problem he said, “North Korea is manufacturing kiloton capacity nuclear weapons.” On the other hand, “The North has little confidence in their large nuclear weapons, and so are also manufacturing 500 kiloton nukes.”

According to the same publication, this representative was also a researcher at the “Oceanographic Industrial Research Facility”, which is a subsidiary of the Secondary Economic Association that covers the entire munitions industry. They primarily develop such things as missiles, and are responsible for production and external business.

The representative let known his desire to defect in May of this year, in a third country.

He was allowed into Korea by the National Information Institute, and investigations are continuing.

Has anyone seen this story reported anywhere else? I’m particularly asking you Korean-speaking Marmot readers.

Update: Adam, your correction is noted.

Three noteworthy articles from Waiwai

The Waiwai section of the Mainichi newspaper’s English language website is usually nothing but a collection of sleazy but entertaining lasciviousness, but this week they actually have three very interesting and more serious stories translated from the Japanese weekly magazines.

First, Shukan Shincho reports on newly discovered documents that allege Hitler actually had plans in place to escape to and hide out in Japan after the Reich fell.

As the Soviets relentlessly pounded the German dictator and his cronies holed up in the subterranean fortress in the German capital, moves were apparently afoot to whisk away top Nazis on long-range Condor airplanes to Japan, journalist Eiichiro Tokumoto writes in the prestigious weekly.

Tokumoto cites a top secret letter dated April 24, 1945, that Toshikazu Kase, then Japan’s Ambassador to Switzerland, wrote to Shigemitsu Togo, Japan’s Foreign Minister at the time.

Kase, a career diplomat whose CV would later include stints as Japan’s first ambassador to the United Nations, was then involved with top secret peace negotiations with Allen Dulles, an operative with the U.S.’ Office of Strategic Services, the forerunner of today’s Central Intelligence Agency.

Kase’s letter to Togo shows the diplomat was worried that an already struggling Japan was about to be lumbered with a bevy of nasty Nazis.

Second, Asahio Genio reports that Yoshinori Watanabe, the Kumicho (Don, Godfather) of the Yamaguchi Gumi, Japan’s largest Yakuza clan, has unexpectedly retired.

Hundreds of yakuza gang bosses from across Japan went to the Yamaguchi-gumi’s Kobe headquarters for the July 29 meeting as they were watched by scores of police and media representatives.

Watanabe, 64, announced his retirement in a statement read out by Saizo Kishimoto, general manager of the syndicate’s headquarters.

“I’ve been kumicho for 16 years, but been sick for the past four years and can no longer fulfill my responsibilities, so I’m retiring,” Asahi Geino quotes Kishimoto saying on Watanabe’s behalf.

Apparently, the huge meeting room where the gang bosses sat in silence while the announcement was made, with the hush broken only when some broke down in tears.

This resignation is particularly big news because, according to the article, “Watanabe was the first ever leader of the Yamaguchi-gumi to be alive when his successor assumed office.”

I get such a kick out of the fact that the Yakuza are such a public organization. Can you imagine Tony Soprano’s stereotypically sleazy Jewish lawyer going on Channel 11 Eyewitness News and reading a statement that he has taken over the organization following the arrest of his uncle Junior?

Lastly, we actually do have one about sex. Shukan Post reports that, for the first time ever, Japan’s Administration Commission of Motion Picture Code of Ethics will allow un-mosaiced human genitals to appear onscreen.

But, with the Japanese premiere in late August of “Kinsey,” local moviegoers will get their first unadulterated glimpse of both male and female reproductive organs.

“We discussed it quite a bit internally before deciding the scene where the organs appear is really important for the overall movie and that we wanted it to be screened uncut and without a mosaic,” a spokesman for Shochiku, the distributor of “Kinsey,” tells Shukan Post.

Eirin, which has a strict policy of prohibiting the display or genitalia or pubic hair, has bent when it comes to “Kinsey,” a biopic of U.S. sex academic Alfred Kinsey.

“It’s not on screen for long and, overall, we decided that the scene did not touch on Eirin’s regulations,” a spokesman for the movie ethics committee tells Shukan Post.

I thought Kinsey was a very good film, and it seems a rather appropriate film to break the barrier of onscreen genitalia in Japan. Will they embrace Kinsey’s example in the future? Can Japan’s film board lose their juvenile attitude towards the human body, or will they revert to their old ways and continue to contribute to Japan’s culture of sexual fetishism by blocking ordinary and healthy depictions of sex? Stay tuned.

Japan’s Arlington

Defenders of Prime Minister Koizumi’s visits to Yasukuni Shrine inevitably compare the shrine with America’s Arlington National Cemetary.

Yasukuni enshrines the spirits of all of Japan’s war dead. Reporters tend to misunderstand what that means. Yasukuni does not contain the actual remains of these people, instead it contains a number of large scrolls on which the names of the dead are ritually inscribed, allowing the shrine to be a vehicle through which prayers and offerings can be given to the spirits of the dead.

While Yasukuni’s rolls contain the names of over 2.5 million deceased soldiers, the controversy stems from the 1068 convicted war criminals honored in the shrine, particularly the 14 class A war criminals whose names were secretly added to the list of souls honored by the shrine in 1978. Clearly, Yasukuni’s official policy is to allow the enshrinement of any former soldier or military official, regardless of the crimes that they have committed.

How does this actually compare with Arlington’s policy?

A recent and ongoing stink over Arlington’s acceptance of a convicted murder reminds me of the Yasukuni controversy. This Washington Post article on the Arlington scandal gives us some insight into their policy. The most important bits are highlighted.

Although Wagner’s criminal history came as a surprise to the cemetery, his crimes do not necessarily exclude him from an Arlington burial.

“A capital crime and being sentenced to life in prison without parole, or a death sentence, would preclude him from being buried in Arlington,” Calvillo said. Anything lesser would not.

According to a spokeswoman at the Washington County judiciary, Wagner was eligible for parole.

Furthermore, as someone who served on active duty in the armed forces and was honorably discharged, he was eligible for a “standard” burial there (for “full” honors — including a band, a caisson and a military escort — more stringent requirements have to be met). For an Army private first class, as Wagner was, pallbearers for his service would have been provided by the 3rd Infantry at Fort Myer.

The cemetery does not do background checks on those buried there, Calvillo said, adding that it is up to their families to share such information. Wagner’s sister could not be located for comment.

In the 1960s, the Department of Defense denied an Arlington burial to a decorated World War II veteran who had been chairman of the New York State Communist Party and had been convicted for advocating the overthrow of the U.S. government.

After a three-year legal fight by his family, he was buried at Arlington.

In 1997, Congress passed legislation barring those convicted of capital crimes from being buried in a national cemetery. The law was enacted to preclude any possibility that Oklahoma City bomber Timothy J. McVeigh, a Persian Gulf War veteran, would be buried at Arlington.

For most convicted criminals, however, there are no restrictions.

So does this mean that others among the 290,000 people buried in the cemetery could be convicted killers?

“It is definitely a possibility,” Calvillo said. “If you’re eligible, you’re eligible.”

Of the 14 Class A war criminals, 7 of them were executed by hanging and 4 were sentenced to life imprisonment. One was sentenced to a term of 20 years, and two died of natural causes before sentencing.

It would seem that even if Yasukuni operated under Arlington’s rules, 3 of the 14 Class A war criminals would still be eligible for honors. It is also worth noting that Arlington’s rules became significantly more stringent in 1997. In 1978, when the 14 were enshrined in Yasukuni, there were no comparable rules in place, and it seems none of the 1068 war criminals would have been turned away. Of course, this is based on civilian convictions. Does anybody know how convictions by military courts affect a soldier’s right to burial at Arlington?

Photos of homemade Gundam

Saw this page listed over on Gizmodo with a plea for translation, so here we go.

According to their report page, these photos were taken July 30 2000 in a field in the middle of nowhere, Okayama prefecture. The Gundam was constructed not out of “Gundamania” but because they “wanted to build a bipedal walking vehicle.”

Gundam photos in Kume, Okayama prefecture.

For now we just picked it up.
It was heavy, but we managed…
You won’t get any larger photos by clicking.
Sorry, next time.


Photographer: Yohman
Taken from below.
Cockpit closed.


Photographer: Hamu
Rear-view. Bad angle (sweat)
Taken from a nearby field.


Photographer: Yohman
View of the scenery from inside the cockpit.
Continue reading Photos of homemade Gundam

Amusingly bad editing

Example one:

I spotted an AP article on Salon.com with the headline ‘Bush Holds Latin American Ally at Ranch.’ Maybe I’ve just been reading a lot of stories about torture at Gitmo and in US controlled prisons in Iraq and Afghanistan, but no matter how many times I read the headline it still gives me completely the wrong impression.

Other versions of the headline used by other news outlets reporting the same story:

Colombia president to meet Bush – BBC

Bush Welcomes Colombia’s Uribe at Ranch – Manchester Guardian

Bush Hosts Latin American Ally at Ranch – Manchester Guardian running the same AP story as Salon. Extra points for fixing the headline.

Bush welcomes Colombian leader – San Antonio Express

Let me suggest in the future that the editors at the Associated Press and/or Salon try and remember the difference between the words ‘hold’ and ‘host.’

Example two:

I was on the website Torrentspy.com, looking for some illegal downloads (of course, an activity I only engage in when I’m outside of the United States) when I spotted this article about the possible re-legalization of medical LSD in Russia. I don’t have any particular fascination with LSD, having never even bothered to try it, but it is a topic of moderate interested and so I proceeded to skim the article. Nothing about it really stuck in my mind until I got to the following bit:

Barbara Streisand signed the above-mentioned petition. The actress confessed that LSD helped her survive the nervous breakdown she had after discovering that her only son was a faggot.

I may actually have done a double-take; when was the last time you saw somebody called a faggot in a newspaper article?

I looked up the original source of the article, the English version of the Russian Pravda. The same line at English.pravda.ru reads:

The actress confessed that it was LSD, which helped her survive the nervous breakdown, when the star discovered that her only son was a homosexual.

I’m glad to see that they corrected that gaff. As offensive as it was, I can actually believe it was an honest mistake by a Russian translator whose linguistic command of English surpasses his cultural understanding. On the other hand, Salon still has their truly lousy headline.