What to do with 10,000 yen?

A criminal who found his way to a new life through the love of a woman has returned the money he stole from a post office in March:

Repentant robber returns cash, with interest

TOKYO (Reuters) – A Japanese man who robbed a post office returned more money than he stole and turned himself in after deciding to come clean for the sake of his girlfriend.

The 33-year-old stole 340,000 yen ($2,300) at knifepoint from a post office in western Tokyo in March. Ridden with guilt, he went back to the post office at the end of May and left 350,000 yen in an envelope on the counter before running off.

The Mainichi newspaper quoted the man as saying he gave an extra 10,000 yen back because he was sorry for what he had done.

A Tokyo police department spokesman said they were still discussing what to do with the extra cash.

How much discussion does it take to decide what to do with 10,000 yen in cold hard cash? I have some suggestions:

  • Buy 1 air-conditioned T-shirt at the special online price of 9,500 yen. That would leave enough for a beef bowl, with 20 yen leftover to phone home and let your mom know how delicious it was.
  • Acquire 1 share in Fast Retailing, operator of bargain clothes chain Uniqlo. With Japan’s economic reform drive set to stall before it comes to true fruition, the prospects of the low-price retail market in Japan continue to look brighter and brighter! Again that would leave you with 500 yen left over, which you could use to celebrate your soon-to-be-newfound wealth with some ice cream at the Cold Stone Creamery located in the swanky Roppongi Hills office complex.
  • Save it at Tokyo Mitsubishi UFJ Bank. With interest rates at 0.001%, assuming that Japan’s prices are just about exactly flat at this point, in a year’s time you’d have 10,010 yen!
  • Get the luckiest guy in the precinct to play pachinko and double the money to buy a semi-legal prostitute. You can use the 80 minutes that can be purchased at 20,000 yen to convince Yuki to leave this sinful lifestyle a la He Got Game.

    • Anyone else have some suggestions for the Tokyo police?

    8 thoughts on “What to do with 10,000 yen?”

    1. I heard a little bit about this guy. I guess it doesn’t pay to have a conscience, huh? At any rate, leave it to the police to be baffled as to what to do with 10,000 yen. I’d say the air conditioned shirt looks like a good bet with summer coming on!

    2. The saddest thing of all would be if this woman dumps him after he’s sent to jail… Not an unlikely prospect, I’m sure.

    5. I wonder if the police could have taken it. Curzon and I tried to give a policeman some noodles (during our famous Coffee Ramen Expedition) and he declined saying that to accept noodles from us would be against anti-corruption laws… I imagine that it’s even closer to bribery when you’re confessing to a crime…

    6. Right, clearly they can’t just pocket the money. Perhaps one way they could “use” the money is as evidence of attempted bribery so they can throw the book at this guy.

    7. Well, I remember him refusing — I don’t remember his response being that detailed. But it would be pretty clear that police can’t accept anything like that (abandoned cash becomes the property of the government, not the police).

    8. abandoned cash becomes the property of the government, not the police

      Then the answer is simple – convert it into small change and use the coins on the next few Prime Ministers’ trips to Yasukuni. (I’m sure Curzon would be in favour.)

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