This ultra dorky gaming blog run by some anonymous American nerd has the most hilariously bad Japanese I have ever seen. This is so amazingly ridiculously atrocious that it makes Engrish.com look like Geoffrey Chaucer.
Nintendo は再度上がる! 反抗して準備ができているか。
Nintendo は再度上がる。Nintendo の回転は実施中にある。準備ができているか。考えるものを忘れなさい知っている。賭博の回転のために準備されなさい。液浸の回転! 秘密によってはハリウッドがBroadway に会うところにがある。 第12 力の時4 への10 は見るものである。ない実際はspec シートでしかし。 eMagin は真実を保持する。 Nintendo は再度上がる。 反抗して準備ができているか。
Seriousgamer007 はRedmond に内部にある。私がであるかだれ秘密は残る。 信じなさい 回転は来ている!SeriousGamer007 は実質及びNintendo の内部にである!
The grammar is honestly so bad that I think the only way to properly convey the effect is to run it through Babelfish.
Nintendo rises for the second time! Opposing, does preparation do? Nintendo rises for the second time. As for the revolution of Nintendo it is in the midst of executing. Does preparation do? Forget those which you think you have known. Prepare for turning the gambling. Revolution of immersion! At the point where Hollywood meets to Broadway depending upon secret bitterly it is. At the time of 12th power 10 to 4 is something which is seen. It is not, but really with the spec seat. EMagin keeps truth. Nintendo rises for the second time. Opposing, does preparation do? As for Seriousgamer007 in Redmond it is inside. Am I or, some secret remains. Believes revolution has come! SeriousGamer007 is inside substance and Nintendo!
He strings together grammatical structures that make no sense together-for ‘immersion’ he uses the word that means literally ‘to immerse something in liquid.’ Gambling? I have no idea. He seems to be trying to say something like “ten to the fourth power times twelve” but instead of actually using the mathematical terms, he just uses the literal words ‘times’ and ‘power,’ enabling the ちんぷんかんぶん that you see before you.
Now, I’m not just making fun of him for writing bad Japanese. Everyone writes stuff just as bad as this in language class. No, it’s not just that it’s bad, but that he clearly thinks he’s so goddamn cool for being enough of an uber-dork to write idiotic nonsense about Japanese videogames in the holy language itself. Even written in English it would have been such fanboyish blather that, after reading it, you might wonder for a second if merely by reading this blog you might be somehow rendering invalid all of the maturity you have developed since the sixth grade. Just look at the kind of blather that he actually DOES write in English.
Thank you for following this blog. This blog has become enormously popular. Gamers from countries all over the world have found this blog. This blog leads the war on gaming dominance for Nintendo.
This blog is at the forefront of that battle. The Nintendo blog to change everything.
This is clearly the guy in your Japanese 101 class who embodies all the stereotypes. His very existence casts a dark cloud over all of us who study Japanese and happen to also enjoy pop culture like video games or manga instead of a strict diet of noh, geisha and zen. In response, I would like to borrow the words of yesterday’s SomethingAwful post.
I would like to take a moment to apologize to the Japanese. The people from the United States and Canada that end up living in your country are almost all horrible and I am really sorry about that. Most Americans don’t really love manga, Pocky and babbling for hours on end about obscure videogame minutiae.
“EMagin keeps truth” probably is supposed to mean (somehow) that the company eMagin is the secret to the Nintendo Revolution. eMagin makes VR stereoscopic visors, something Nintendo has repeatedly denied being part of their new system, both due to impracticality and because of excessive cost. This guy is universally recognized in the gaming community to be one of the premiere nut jobs of the day.
OK, I can read most of that. It’s terrible, but I can read most of it. But what in the name of heaven does “Oppose, are your preparations complete” mean?
Probably fed it through an automatic j-e translator.
The grammar of the original Japanese is terrible in a way that could only have been written by a human. I was thinking about how to render a similar effect in English, and I realized that babelfish was the only way to get it just right.
反抗 – Hankou: opposition, in the sense of a rebellion or a revolt. One of the things that this guy likes to say in english is “A Revolution is coming! Are you ready to revolt?” … I guess that’s what “Nintendo rises for the second time! Opposing, does preparation do?” is supposed to be.
Sorry to post twice, but if you take “Are you ready to revolt?” and translate it using babelfish, you get the exact same broken expression that he uses in his title. I guess a computer can screw up that bad.
Yeah, it’s all the wrong syntax. He should read up on his Marxist propaganda to get the proper inspiration — words like 革命、自給自足、宣言・・・
But this is missing the point — that his shit is just awful no matter what language he uses:
:shudder:
Of course, I’d hate for someone to dig up what I wrote at age 15 and put that on the internet… so as long as he’s still in high school I can understand.
BTW:
Those of us who enjoy neither and who stick to the glories of great food and fine women have never had this problem.
I find that mentioning you like anime (or even live action Japanese movies) is very taboo among foreiners here, but they are great tools for learning the language, and sometimes even entertaining. That being said, the anime club at my college was dead embarassing. I’ve never shook my head in disgust so much. They wouldn’t stop with the nerd humor. Hey, I’m trying to watch pretty princess ballareena wando girl here!
I’ve used Babelfish output in homework assignments in my composition & comparative grammar classes (as a caveat against online MT in the former). I give students example texts in both languages and have them see if they can figure out what the original was.
In my professional (snork!) opinion, he’s using Babelfisk for all of it. In addition to Matt’s example, have a look at the output for “Welcome to the Nintendo Revolution”, “Nintendo will rise again!” and “Not on the spec sheet however in reality.” With a bit of time (and a lot more interest!) it should be possible to reconstruct his whole message. (ahem) Pretty funny how clueless a supposed Nintendo insider can be, no?
(On the other topic, nothing wrong with an eclectic balance of trad & pop, is there?)